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Smells like...fish
20 most recent entries

Date:2006-12-26 01:05
Subject:he's a baha'i...but his wife's a bah- itch!

Since my parents decided to move into their motorhome (sigh) I've been livin' the dream at Tom and Andy's.
Ammenities include:
300 cable channels (porn? but of course)
The largest television I have ever fucking seen
Several other televisions- you know, just in case
Only the finest in Costco junk food
Downstairs x-box
Upstairs x-box
The "super closet", an entire closet filled with super nintendos (plural intentended), books, accessories and oh-so many games
Computers (porn? but of course)
liquor cabinet (essential for a yukoner)
Pinball machines
the list goes on...

Northerners have it all wrong, I am moving back to Saskatoon to live with my brothers. And when finally I re-emerge from this house, 400 pounds heavier with no social skills to get my gastric bypass surgery, I would love to see you all...
until then I'm busy, conquering the galaxy, honing my magic skills and creating Mario Paint masterpieces.
It's been fun, see you in a couple years (unless of course I die like some Diablo obsessed asian kid)

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Date:2006-11-20 14:32


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Date:2006-10-17 12:55

The Vancouver airport is terrifying,especially if you have spent the last couple years of your life in the North.

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Date:2006-10-01 20:05
Subject:I wish I had an accordian

The Pit almost burned down today.
The news that there was smoke coming from the building was met with amazing apathy. The bar patrons all just laughed and kept drinking.
"Well, had to happen sometime."
"If we get evacuated can we take our drinks outside?"
"Is it still happy hour?"
While Darwin, who started the fire by carelessly disposing his roach, tried to piss it out from the second floor window I suggested that we have some shots of fireball and wait for the roof to fall down on us. we did.

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Date:2006-04-19 23:19
Subject:Representin the fam

Turns out I am not the only Roebuck with a Blog.
see Diaryland user "im-a-banana"

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Date:2006-04-14 02:16
Subject:Who would ja rather

I would rather have sex with...
Brent Spiner than Patrick Stewart.
I feel sorry for the guy who has to mop up the floor of the holo-deck after I'm done.

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Date:2006-03-15 16:57
Subject:Dog the Bounty Hunter= Ultimate dirt boner

Dear Regina friends,

Shotgun and Jaybird want to play a show in Regina, who can they contact to make that happen?

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Date:2006-02-04 11:34
Subject:Germans, Germans and faux Germans

Apparently the inherent coolness of a hovercraft is not enough to overcome the inherent lameness of 100 Germans.
Hi ho.

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Date:2006-01-24 11:43
Subject:Boom Boom Boom Boom Apocolyptic Doom

Well Skatch it's been fun (I use the word "fun" loosely) but the time has come for me to hit the ol' dusty trail. Two days in the Horse and then back to dodgy Dodge, where I can finally join in the group make-outs. As soon as I figure out how to get these snowshoes on the plane I'm fuckin' out.
Suck my oil.

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Date:2006-01-02 20:18

2006 I can't believe we made it!

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Date:2005-12-14 08:15
Subject:Moody chimp with robotic eye born in small Northern town

There is a stranger in town, he wears a trench coat, carries a wool blanket over one shoulder, and can be caught occasionally laughing hysterically at some private joke or reading from "psalms". If only I had a dreamy, dog-musher lover (you may remember him from the year 19-dickety-6) he could protect me from all the Steve Kormendys and jesus-freaks that can't seem to get enough of olde Dawson town.

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Date:2005-11-29 00:24
Subject:our house in the middle of our street...

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Date:2005-11-25 16:20
Subject:A tasty treat for a Toefuck to eat...

Degree be damned, I'm never leaving the Yukon.

An epic ski-dooing adventure at Henderson convinced me that I'm not Paul fucking Bunyan, but i would sure like to be. I am planning on renting a ski-doo with the sole purpose of going to the coffee shop and back, ski-dooing is the new walking.

Taking a year off to "find myself"/ enrolling in the school of life, may have been the best idea since Molly's tattoo, and possibly as permanent. If I return to the city with Carharts, a terrible home haircut, and a nervous twitch, will I be on a one-way track to pariah-dom? The Yukon giveth (dance parties, caribou fondue, alcaholism) and the Yukon taketh away (hygiene, standards, ability to leave)

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Date:2005-11-18 12:06
Subject:Your favourite indie-rock song is the soundtrack for an SUV commercial

Yesterday, while trying to manoveur through thigh-high snow, I thought "This would be a good place to film an S.U.V. commercial". Today, a parade of S.U.V.s drove into town to begin filming. The premise of aformentioned commercial: SUV drives through desolate arctic (possibly North Daw), meets man on dog sled, driver and musher exchange pleasantries. Perhaps I will go into town and offer to be Kraft service (tuna? dry cake-muffin? anyone?)

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Date:2005-11-01 20:38
Subject:melons and pineapple does not a fruit salad make...

but put them in a muffin and that muffin I will take

Daylight savings, eh? Daylight? What? Where?If Dawson City hadn't been forced to fire all elected city officials (so many hands in so many cookie jars), I would file my grievances and put an end to this time change foolishness. I missed Radio Free Roscoe and I demand retribution! Waste of time? Maybe, but I am living on the dole in the sub-arctic.
What's your excuse?

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Date:2005-10-15 15:55
Subject:It's not about sexuality, it's about levels of despair..

A Thanksgiving feast is not complete until someone gives thanks for their "super tight vagina", I personally am thankful for Kim Mitchell's breakthrough hit 'Might As Well Go For a Soda' and Collette's super tight vagina.
It is going to require five boxes of KD to fuel our post-Pit bodies (the town went mad with power last night) and prepare us for a bonfire at Sandy Silver's. I plan to get Jen crunked, thereby increasing my chances of winning the little wager we have going. No woman can resist the power of the bacardi breezer/raven-haired teacher combo (Pop and chips, best combo)

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Date:2005-09-13 19:43
Subject:crazy YTG, always so crazy

Did you know that they evacuated downtown Whitehorse on Sept.11? quoi?

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Date:2005-08-21 20:47
Subject:I sometimes forget puncuation and grammar exist

Tortilla Flat (aka The last burlesque house of the North) no longer shakes with the giggles of four sexually frustrated femmes. Now it's only me, jenn and Horjah the random latino man who has taken to sleeping on our floor. For the last three days I have been seeing Brette and molly doppelgangers everywhere.

Today the Spanglish competed in the Dawson City Women's poker tournament with 50 other local women. I did really well and hung on for about 5 hours (two of which I was chipleader), I eventually went all in for 500$ on Ace Queen off suit and got a pair of Aces but some lucky bitch who works for the city flopped three tens.

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Date:2005-07-30 18:42
Subject:Some people should never do ecstacy

Goodbye Sackville thanks for the sweet ass and hilarious yearbooks. Stephen Malkmus just got a lot sexier!
check out lj user lame9inches, another mystery for this sweet crime-fightin' squad.

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Date:2005-07-16 15:21
Subject:knify stabby

40 thousand throats will be cut in one night by a running man...or in a drunken klingon knife fight.

An obsession with blades, shanks and shivs ends in bloodshed and the aptly named Brette "seamripper" Gabel took some crippling blows. Someone is out to get the Superfriendzxxx is it Karma, sweet justice, coke addled locals, uncie Berwin, the jewy neighbour? The Yukon giveth and the Yukon taketh away


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